Growing up I was very self-conscious, and receiving compliments were never comfortable for me. I found it hard to justify it when I felt I had not put in enough effort.
Do you also find yourself saying these when you receive a compliment?
"That’s not true!"
"Oh, it wasn’t that big of a deal."
"I didn’t really do much."
"Oh, but I did make that mistake."
What you are doing is you are arguing with the other person how you didn’t do a good job at whatever the person is complimenting you on (your look, your presentation, your creation, etc.,).
What is a compliment?
It is how the other person feels about you.
Why should you deny someone of that?
Compliments are a simple, effortless way to brighten someone else's day and in turn yours.
It's just a handful of kind words that can change your outlook on the world.
Then why do we put up glass walls for kind words to bounce off of us?
We deflect, deny, minimize compliments and rarely accept it graciously. And worse is giving a compliment back. It can sound disingenuous because it may come across as you are giving one just because you received one.
It has taken me years and a lot of practice to learn how to accept compliments graciously.
You remember how when you were a kid, and someone would compliment you, your parents would say, “Say thank you” and you would.
You know what? Our parents taught us the right way of accepting compliments; it is really that simple.
Three easy steps to graciously accepting compliments:
1. Acknowledge the compliment (I really appreciate you saying that)
2. Say thank you (Thank you)
3. Tell them how much it means to you. (It means a lot to me that you’d take the time to say that.)
So this is how it plays out:
Your boss, “You did a good job there.”
You, “I really appreciate you saying that. Thank you, it means a lot that you’d take the time to say that.”
It is that simple.
Now go, practice it but first watch this.